Conservative Bouquet

True Blue

Suggested message:

Dear Dave,

I hope you'll be pumped and passionate to receive this hardworking bouquet from my longterm, economical florist. I've put in some blue blooded lisianthus, some lovely European agapanthus (I hope you're happy to keep those in for now?) and some lavender to help you chillax with a box set once the campaign is over. Apologies that the bouquet is a little short but you know what it's like - once you start cutting it's hard to know when to stop.

Tally ho, old chap.


Suggested additional gifts:
It was the great man's favourite tipple, so Winston Churchill Pol Roger Champagne should be good enough for Flashman too. It's just the sort of thing that he and the Bullingdon Boys would have had with their breakfast, just like Winston used to.

Let DCam know what you think of his chances!
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Tweet disgust!

Labour Bouquet

The Red Flag Flying

Suggested message:

Dear David Ed,

You must receive lots of flowers now that Millifandom is in full swing, but those other, out of touch fans just don't get it. Look, Ed, if you're asking me: "Do red, red roses feature heavily in this bouquet?" - then my answer is "absolutely!" and I make no apology for that. Is the success of this arrangement 100% dependent on the Scottish thistle? Hell yes! Are we right on Brand? I'm glad you asked me that and what I say to you is: Parklife!

Up the workers, comrade, and keep the red flower flying.

Suggested additional gifts:
We have a wide range of full on red wines you can send to Ed, with this red Baldrick the most appropriate choice. Make sure he drinks it in moderation though, as nobody wants to see him stumble.

Let Red Ed know what you think of his chances!
Tweet support!



Tweet disgust!

Liberal Democrat Bouquet

Lovers Not Fighters

Suggested message:

Dear Nick,

I know being in government has been a difficult and startling surprise so here's a bouquet straight from the rose garden. I found it hard to balance the right blue and a gauche red, so the yellow roses veer unpredictably between the two. I fear they've become a little crushed in the process. Do you agree with me, Nick?

If you don't win, I'm sure you'll be very very sorry. Again.

Suggested additional gifts:
There's a good chance Cleggy will lose some colleagues on May 7th. Since we know he is an apology fetishist, this I'm sorry you're leaving balloon seems the most appropriate gift.

Let Cleggers know what you think of his chances!
Tweet support!



Tweet disgust!

Green Party Bouquet

Earth Mother

Suggested message:

Dear Natalie,

Campaigning can leave even the most noble eco warrior tired and confused, so I hope that this tribute to Gaia perks you up. I've included Eucalyptus to remind you of home (not Guardian HQ. Your other home). Eucalyptus will also help heal your Earth Mother voice; it has wonderful soothing properties. (Gah! I'm sorry, I didn't mean to mention property - blame a brainfade!).

Peace and love, sister.

Suggested additional gifts:
Some chocolates Mon Cher? Right on!

Let Natalie know what you think of her chances!
Tweet support!



Tweet disgust!

SNP Bouquet

The Union. What Union?

Suggested message:

Dear Nicola,

I know that you're busy planning a lock in party - I mean a party lock out - but I hope you find time to appreciate this wee bouquet. The traditional Scottish stems symbolise your hugely understated, barely discernible patriotism, and I've combined them with crocosmia 'Red Lucifer', as befits "the most dangerous woman in Britain".

Cry freedom. Cry Nicola!

Suggested additional gifts:
Remind Scotland's Feisty Minister it's the 800th anniversary of Magna Carta this year, a document that will come in handy for someone planning on penning a new constitution soon.

Let wee Nicola know what you think of her chances!

Tweet support!



Tweet disgust!

UKIP Bouquet

The Gatekeeper

Suggested message:

Dear Nigel,

I'm sorry to hear you've been under the weather, bad weather which was caused by ill winds blowing in from Europe, winds over which we have no control no matter what anyone else says. I think you'll be proud of this bouquet, unashamedly built on England's fairest roses and with a 'no-nonsense' border that guards the cross of St George at its heart.

Bottoms up.

Suggested additional gifts:
We think this any bottle our selection t will help Nigel through the night - plus it's probably the only port he won't be reluctant to open.

Let Nige know what you think of his chances!
Tweet support!



Tweet disgust!





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